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-   -   It is OK if you are mediocre. (http://www.sowpub.com/forum/showthread.php?t=10014)

GordonJ October 16, 2017 10:39 AM

It is OK if you are mediocre.
 
Mediocre: Average and Ordinary.

synonyms: ordinary, average, middling, middle-of-the-road, uninspired, undistinguished, indifferent, unexceptional, unexciting, unremarkable, run-of-the-mill, pedestrian, prosaic, lackluster, forgettable, amateur, amateurish

The truth. MOST of us are average people. And we get shamed about it.

There is a billion dollar industry of self improvement, to get you out of mediocrity and into (I guess) something more "special".

Often ACHIEVEMENT is equated with success, and rising above mediocrity. Harvey Weinstein was considered a "Hollywood Superstar". Certainly above average.

So was Bernie Madoff. BRILLIANT money manager, until he wasn't.

We are schooled from a very young age, to "dream big", to BE SOMEBODY.
In the USA we are obsessed with becoming somebody.

FAME, is now the currency, more important than talent (see Kardashians for example).

Even the Mega Church preachers are selling books and courses on ACHIEVEMENT, accomplishment, success.

Well, here is a different opinion. You are fine just as you are.

You ARE mediocre, and that is OK. You are no less a person in God's eye than a rich president.

So, maybe you would like my new group, MU, Mediocres UNanonymous.

See, I think there is a lot of stress out there because too many people feel they are not living up to their potential.

You know you're smarter than your results show, shame on you.
You have talents and abilities going to waste, shame on you.
You have knowledge, wisdom and experience you are not sharing, shame on you.

And over the decades I've worked with many people who struggle in their fight against what they "feel" THEY should and ought to be. These feelings create inaction, they cause a less than full effort, and too often become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Being what you are, put up against the giant shadow of what you THINK you could be (or could've been), is a comparison which could be preventing you from accepting the gifts you have and being grateful you have an average and ordinary life. Especially here is USA, it means you're doing pretty dang well in the world of 8 billion people.

So, I say; accept and embrace your mediocrity...and if you so choose, define what you don't want that to be, and choose to do something about it.

Gordon

PS. Some of the most extraordinary people I know, live average and ordinary lives. Mediocre folks indeed, everyday heroes in my book.

Fishman October 16, 2017 09:22 PM

Re: It is OK if you are mediocre.
 
Gordon, thank you for this post. This is (in my opinion) the most profound post yet...ANYWHERE...on the net. And I think you are absolutely right on target....Gary Vaynerchuk mentions this very thing often in his FB posts. In his own way of course...but the underlying message is the same. And I firmly believe this very thing is THE ROOT cause of many problems for a lot of folks. A really good movie that shows this about "us"...those "seeking"....success...."the GOLD"....is The Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman....book was better as always...but the movie was pretty dang good.

Thank you again.

Fred

MMacGillivray October 17, 2017 07:05 AM

Re: It is OK if you are mediocre.
 
Ah, Gordon - a lovely bit of common sense! Thank you :)

I've just been looking in a few Facebook groups for entrepreneurs - and of the three I just joined, everyone's shouting about how good they are and how they're going to help. But people aren't talking to each other and they aren't sharing anything. Not much evidence of common courtesy as new members join; not much response to anyone's "I'm amazing and I can help you" posts - or, to put it another way, why on earth would I stay around if no-one's going to talk TO me but rather AT me.

They all seem to be offering the Secret to absolutely everything and have the answer to absolutely nothing!

Now, how do I tie my shoelaces???

Margaret

ps there was a brilliant TED talk about doing just that - how to tie your shoelaces so that they wouldn't come undone!

GordonJ October 17, 2017 12:50 PM

Thank you and we've discussed Millman before.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fishman (Post 38648)
Gordon, thank you for this post. This is (in my opinion) the most profound post yet...ANYWHERE...on the net. And I think you are absolutely right on target....Gary Vaynerchuk mentions this very thing often in his FB posts. In his own way of course...but the underlying message is the same. And I firmly believe this very thing is THE ROOT cause of many problems for a lot of folks. A really good movie that shows this about "us"...those "seeking"....success...."the GOLD"....is The Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman....book was better as always...but the movie was pretty dang good.

Thank you again.

Fred


Socrates. One of my favs. And Millman's too, his spirit guide in THE PEACEFUL WARRIOR. I think his EVERYDAY ENLIGHTENMENT is one of the better books out there on personal growth. He chose to use 12 Gateways, and it is a well written book. I haven't seen the movie, but I'll look for it.

Over the years, I've talked with hundreds, if not thousands of people who have this little DEMON in the back of their minds, it is the demon of WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN. And it is a nagging, a recurring poke in the I with the sharp stick of perceived failure. I wonder who came in second or third at the Trampoline championships? Are they failures because they didn't win?

Does their defeat haunt them as much as Millman's Socratic dreams in his book?

It is attributed to George Bernard Shaw on his deathbed, when asked:
“What would you do if you could live your life over again?"

He replied:
I’d like to be the person I could have been but never was.


I think almost all of us live with some variation of that. The exceptions are the guys who don't make mistakes, are always right, and can't ever lose...you know, the Trumps of the world.

But there are others, who truly took the path less traveled and this brings up an aside, before I continue.

Robert Frost wrote a poem; THE ROAD NOT TAKEN. It might be the most quoted poem in all of self-help, self development and one of the most used by marketing gurus. I find that ironic.

The marketer, who sells his products the same way thousands of other marketers do, who certainly did not hack away the briar bushes or the brambles down the path less traveled, but they,

FOLLOWED the 8 lane super highway of concrete, tested and proven marketing roads to their success...I get a laugh at how they think the Frost poem fits them.

They really believe they took the road less traveled. HA!

Anyhow,

The people who do take the road less traveled are living in the present and being great at being an average and ordinary guy. They are not maketers, gurus, or cult leaders. They don't write books, do seminars nor have you walk on hot coals.

They go to work. Raise their families. They are present IN their lives, not offering advice to others on how they should live, but demonstrating by quiet grace, with their own EXAMPLE.

I know they are out there, and you won't read about them in a book, or see them on TV, and they will never be known outside of their small little worlds, but you will see a mile long procession of people they influenced when they are gone and on the way to their graves.

Anyhow, I'll have more to say on this later.

But, just as it is OK to be mediocre, it is OK to pursue your own ideas of what your life will mean. I don't know how to measure greatness, or how bad-ass someone is, or how important a life is or was.

So, follow whatever dreams you have, just be aware of how those ideas got put into your brain to begin with, and how influential they are in your everyday life.

More to come.

GordonJ


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