Is there a "fear" that's holding you back? What should you do about it?
 

I just got the book "How To Get Rich" by Felix Dennis. In case you never heard of him, he's a British publishing "tycoon" who's worth somewhere in the range of $500 million to $900 million (according to his own estimate)... I wrote about him a little before (you can read a little more about Felix Dennis in my earlier post)...

Anyway... I'm only starting the book, but one of the things he emphasizes early on is FEAR... That FEAR is what holds most people back!

"Fear" can stop you from getting started! He says for many people it's "fear of failure" - the bad consequences of failure. But it's also fear of PUBLIC failure! If you try and fail, and everyone knows about it, it could be humiliating - and some people can't take that! Some people feel it's better to "play it safe"... If you apply for a job, and don't get it, nobody really needs to know about that "failure", because it's usually done and over in a few days. But a business is much more "public"...

Speaking of myself, I don't think I have a "fear of failure." (I've failed too many times in the past to let it worry me too much! I think I have a good track record on "bouncing back"...) But, I do have a "fear" too... Which is, I have a "fear" of "offending" people. I am not easily offended myself - but I hate the idea that I might "offend" others. So I would find it "hard" to do a "rich jerk" type promotion, because it's intentionally offensive... But that fear is probably also holding me back as well. (You don't need to offend others to succeed, but - you do have to keep in mind that your promotions may "annoy" others who are not your prospects... Simply because they're not interested.)

What other fears are there? Any good tips on overcoming these fears?

I'll let you know what else Felix Dennis says in the book (if he has any good advice - I'm still reading the relevant chapter on this topic)... :)

Cheers,

Dien

Re: Is there a "fear" that's holding you back? What should you do about it?
 

You hit the nail on the head, Dien.

I'm deathly afraid that, if I sit in this chair doing internet stuff much more, I'll end up crippled and in a wheelchair due to inactivity. Not what you expected probably, but a fear nonetheless.

In all honesty, I should get well enough to exercise again, lose weight, and get out and do my own thing. I'm working on the wellness and weight things now. So far, so good. Just have to remember that 'slow' is better than 'no' progress.

Sandi Bowman

Re: Is there a "fear" that's holding you back? What should you do about it?
 

Dien,

Don't worry... Some people are given the Gift of Not being able to “offend" people... :)

Respect has something to do with it...

Have No Fear... Google solves all of my Fears and more... Addictions is another story... :)

Transforming Fear...
http://www.authentic-breathing.com/t...rming_fear.htm

Denis Waitley
Procrastination is the fear of success. People procrastinate because they are afraid of the success that they know will result if they move ahead now. Because success is heavy, carries a responsibility with it, it is much easier to procrastinate and live on the 'someday I'll' philosophy...

http://www.motivational-inspirationa...&categoryid=40

Steve Pavlina offers some Great reads... Interesting Podcasts & ideas...

http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...ercoming-fear/
http://www.stevepavlina.com/

Phil

Re: Is there a "fear" that's holding you back? What should you do about it?
 

Hi Sandi,

I agree that lack of movement is a danger of the internet! If it's not part of a person's usual routine (due to work or whatever), it's a good idea to really make an effort, I think, to go out and do something...

I'm not so great at this myself... But when I am good at it, I go out for regular long walks. :)

The other thing is, I think our "modern" diets are sometimes quite lacking! There are often things in our diet that shouldn't be there (like trans-fats, for example!), and on the other hand, there are other things which should be there, but which are often missing!

Modern farming and food processing techniques have given us so many foods - but they're not always wholesome and balanced for what we need...

Anyway, I was just recently reading about vitamin B6. I read that often as you get older, it's more likely you'll become deficient in this vitamin. And that can have follow-on effects - since vitamin B6 helps keep your cardiovascular system healthy, it helps keep your skin healthy, and it's a precursor for some neurotransmitters in your brain (so you can think clearly)... As of yesterday (when I read about this), I'm gonna be more conscious about making sure I get enough B6. Some good natural sources of B6 are apparently bananas, potatoes, chick peas/garbanzo beans, and chicken, though I also sometimes take a B-complex supplement. Some breakfast cereals are also supplemented with B6 (you have to check the little info-panel to see which ones are)...

However, you reallly do have to watch this stuff. Since otherwise, I think you can be lacking in certain important vitamins or minerals that your body needs - even in our modern day and age...!

(I'm a bit of a "junkie" for this kind of info...)

Cheers :)

Dien

Re: Is there a "fear" that's holding you back? What should you do about it?
 

Some of the fears I grapple with:

* Fear of losing control - I had a hard time delegating tasks.
* Fear of imperfection - a thing had to be perfect before I could talk about it.

Although this is not a fear, its another thing that made me slow:

* Procrastination due to being overwhelmed (with ideas, to-do list).

There is no "Fear of Success"!!!
 

Phil,

Thanks for quoting.


Denis is just plain old wrong.

You see, Procrastination is, in fact, part of our make up. Part of our built in survival mechanism. It is NOT - repeat NOT - due to the fictional "Fear of Success" malarkey. (People only procrastinate on Some things. There are Plenty of things they do that require "Success" at which people do not Procrastinate... so it's not "Fear of Success" at all.)

And those who've read The Success Report know that it isn't "Fear" (of whatever) which holds someone back. Even if you Think it is.

Take Dien, for example (I am using you Dien as you had already expressed something relevant and for convenience).

Dien said...


And yet Dien Does offend people in Certain Ways. Such as making forum changes despite requests otherwise - removing the email address from the old forum for example, and calling it a "test" to Quiet those who wanted it to stay.

I won't get into the why's and wherefores of Selective Offending, but thought it appropriate to draw attention that... things aren't as you Think they are or as they at first Appear. And that's just the way of things.

Michael Ross

Re: There is no "Fear of Success"!!!
 

Hi Michael,

It was a test - in that I was seeing the reaction, and if a lot of people didn't like it, I would have reverted it back to the "old" way. The impression I got was that a lot of people liked it the new way (with "cloaked" email addresses - where you could still email someone through the forum, but you couldn't actually find out their email address unless they emailed you back). That's because - at least at that time - people feared getting email spam. The "cloaked email" system stopped "robot spam email harvesters" from gathering email addresses from the forum, to send their spammy emails to...

However, you do raise a good point, which is - unless you're sitting back and doing nothing - you can't always please everyone. Sometimes, you do have to make a choice, and no matter which choice you make, not everybody will be happy with it... People are diverse!

Thanks, though, for your thoughts. :)

Cheers,

Dien

Re: Fighting Fear
 

Thanks Dien for talking about fear. I got thinking about it and I think there are 2 main causes of fear.

1: Fear of the unknown.
You don't know what others will think. How the event/project/product will turn out. Because its easier and more convenient to stay in our comfort zone - we don't take action quickly or sufficiently.

How to fight the fear of the unknown?

i. Do something interactive.
ii. Take an impromptu acting class.
iii. Go sell door-to-door.
iv. Join a group so that there is peer pressure to do what you're scared of doing.
v. Try out those 21-day or 30-day plans. Where you stick with something for 30 days - to form a habit.
vi. Start public speaking.

2: Fear arising from failures.

Bang your car and you'll be afraid to drive again. Even though the accident may not have been your fault.

The only way to fight this fear is by getting back into the saddle.

Is there any other over-riding fear you can think of?

Re: Is there a "fear" that's holding you back? What should you do about it?
 

Sometimes, little success or achievement in any activity is enough to give people the confidence necessary to overcome their fears.

Some children are afraid of swimming, riding bicycles, or even doing well in certain subjects at school.

We teach our kids to overcome fear by being there with them, and doing these things with them until they learn to do it well enough to enjoy it.

When someone says, "I can't do math!" It's not an ability issue, it's a fear issue. Perhaps they're afraid of being perceived as a nerd or brainiac. In this case, it's about a person’s perception of what they want to be, and doing well in math doesn't fit the mold.

In this case, a change in self-perception along with achievement/success what's needed. "I need to learn how to this if I want to be..."

Thanks for the topic Dien.

Re: Is there a "fear" that's holding you back? What should you do about it?
 

Hi, Dien,

We're two peas in a pod when it comes to devouring the info.

B-6 is the main nutrient deficient in many schizophrenics and is used a lot in orthomolecular psychiatry to treat them. There's a certain segment of the population, not necessarily schizophrenic, who seem to require larger amounts of this nutrient than the general population.

This is one reason why Codex Alimentarius won't work. It's far too restrictive in amounts and is just designed to allow big pharma (pharmaceutical companies) to take over and quadruple the prices of supplements and require doctor visits every time you need a supplement of any kind.

It will also spawn a huge black market in vitamins from clandestine sources that may not be safe, and put many businesses and people out of work, just for starters. Worst of all, many folks who need supplements won't be able to get or afford them. On top of everything else, what it implies for our country's independence and ability to self-rule is horrendous.

Sandi Bowman