Hi Duane. This is my first attempt at Internet Marketing and although I too believe that the sales copy can use a lot of improvement, I'll tell you why I chose it.

When I asked a few people what they thought about the title "Earn $300 a day distributing balloons", I got three types of responses:

1. Sounds like a scam
2. Sounds too good to be true
3. Probably requires a huge investment

It was obvious why they thought that because the Internet is full of people who make false promises and scam people. So I asked, what if I offered Money back guarantee? and I was told, it would help but even that was not enough to convince people that this is for real.

So a friend of mine suggested that I focus only on those people who are skeptical but willing to explore further. So we talked about how to do that and came up with three questions that give a little more information about the business. And that's basically how we came up with the sales copy.

I am hoping that those who have bought my ebook will refer others to me once they have succeeded.

I am also thankful for the many tips I have received from you all.

Thanks
-Samir