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Old February 21, 2012, 05:15 AM
Richard Dennis
 
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Default Re: For Losers Only: A Solution To Your #1 "Catch-22"

TW,

Yes, evidence is the key. For maybe 30% of the population, evidence that others are successful is enough for them to believe. For the rest of us ... I used to look at THAT evidence and be hopeful, but I was not them. From the days when I struck out about 15 times in a row in Little League, I had a ton of evidence that success would never happen for me.

I hit a point which most people hit where you consistently expect to not be successful. And, of course, that is how it worked, and my belief in myself would only decrease. Then my activity would slow to a crawl, to be sure I didn't make more mistakes.

But when I studied and came to understand and practice the idea of testing, my mental state flipped. NOW I could expect to lose every time, and there was no sting, so long as I learned and got better. Evidence began to gather that I could do something right - test and learn and get better. I developed 100% confidence - total belief - that I could make enough mistakes so that I would clearly define what did not work.

And once I believed I could do that, I got bolder, I made mistakes faster, and I hit on some things that actually worked. That gave me evidence that I could do it ... which I never believed before.

Sure, I could be wrong ... but I don't think so. I think for most people, evidence that SOMEONE can do it is not evidence that THEY can do it. They know they lack confidence. They know they can't be successful unless they believe. But they can't truly believe until they have real evidence that they themselves can be successful.

But if you have a "testing" attitude, then, ridiculously, failure becomes evidence of success. And I believed I could fail like rolling off a log, so that worked really well for me.

Richard
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