The perfect trading system?

When I saw "Weekly World News" at the end of the story, I knew the whole thing was most likely made up. And it is.

See: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,630-627115,00.html

---------------
City Diary by Martin Waller
Netting a good yarn
March 29, 2003

AN ALLEGED Wall Street insider dealer, arrested after making a fortune from
suspiciously timed purchases, has come up with the weirdest excuse yet. Andrew
Carlssin, 44, told the Securities and Exchange Commission that he was a time
traveller from the year 2256, taking advantage of our well-documented market
collapse. The SEC is, understandably, unwilling to believe him. "He’s either
a lunatic or a pathological liar," said an insider there.

Such is the story,
apparently culled from a number of news websites, doing the rounds of the City.
Alas, it is merely one of the better internet myths. The SEC has never heard of
Carlssin, and several "facts" are plainly untrue.

It reminds me of Henry Turkelbaum. He was the workaholic New York proof-reader
who spent so long at his desk that his death there went unnoticed by colleagues
for days. Another myth, but well entrenched in "fact" now. The fictitious
Carlssin’s place in history is assured.

Copyright 2003 Times Newspapers Ltd.
---------------

> Boyd, you'll like this story. It follows on
> from what you've posted!

> If you want to predict the future, it's
> easy.... Just time travel from the future,
> back to the past. Yes, that's what this guy
> did....

> Unless, of course, you believe the
> "alternative explanation" of the
> SEC!

> - Dien

> P.S. I'm not recommending doing what this
> guy did - this post is for entertainment
> purposes only. :)

> From
> http://movies.yahoo.com/news/wwn/20030319/104808600007.html
> 'TIME-TRAVELER' BUSTED FOR INSIDER
> TRADING
> Wednesday March 19, 2003

> By CHAD KULTGEN

> NEW YORK -- Federal investigators have
> arrested an enigmatic Wall Street wiz on
> insider-trading charges -- and incredibly,
> he claims to be a time-traveler from the
> year 2256!

> Sources at the Security and Exchange
> Commission confirm that 44-year-old Andrew
> Carlssin offered the bizarre explanation for
> his uncanny success in the stock market
> after being led off in handcuffs on January
> 28.

> "We don't believe this guy's story --
> he's either a lunatic or a pathological
> liar," says an SEC insider.

> "But the fact is, with an initial
> investment of only $800, in two weeks' time
> he had a portfolio valued at over $350
> million. Every trade he made capitalized on
> unexpected business developments, which
> simply can't be pure luck.

> "The only way he could pull it off is
> with illegal inside information. He's going
> to sit in a jail cell on Rikers Island until
> he agrees to give up his sources."

> The past year of nose-diving stock prices
> has left most investors crying in their
> beer. So when Carlssin made a flurry of 126
> high-risk trades and came out the winner
> every time, it raised the eyebrows of Wall
> Street watchdogs.

> "If a company's stock rose due to a
> merger or technological breakthrough that
> was supposed to be secret, Mr. Carlssin
> somehow knew about it in advance," says
> the SEC source close to the hush-hush,
> ongoing investigation.

> When investigators hauled Carlssin in for
> questioning, they got more than they
> bargained for: A mind-boggling four-hour
> confession.

> Carlssin declared that he had traveled back
> in time from over 200 years in the future,
> when it is common knowledge that our era
> experienced one of the worst stock plunges
> in history. Yet anyone armed with knowledge
> of the handful of stocks destined to go
> through the roof could make a fortune.

> "It was just too tempting to
> resist," Carlssin allegedly said in his
> videotaped confession. "I had planned
> to make it look natural, you know, lose a
> little here and there so it doesn't look too
> perfect. But I just got caught in the
> moment."

> In a bid for leniency, Carlssin has
> reportedly offered to divulge
> "historical facts" such as the
> whereabouts of Osama Bin Laden and a cure
> for AIDS.

> All he wants is to be allowed to return to
> the future in his "time craft."

> However, he refuses to reveal the location
> of the machine or discuss how it works,
> supposedly out of fear the technology could
> "fall into the wrong hands."

> Officials are quite confident the
> "time-traveler's" claims are
> bogus. Yet the SEC source admits, "No
> one can find any record of any Andrew
> Carlssin existing anywhere before December
> 2002."

> Weekly World News will continue to follow
> this story as it unfolds. Keep watching for
> further developments.