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Old November 19, 2000, 10:27 AM
Dien Rice
Posts: n/a
Default Texanisms are hotter than a jalapeno in a heatwave....

> Wow, Dien!

> This is an amazing discovery, one which I
> will surely watch closely.....and the name
> of the URL really says it all....

> Something with STRANGE and TEXAS in the
> title....either redundant or a non sequitar,
> depending upon where you reside, eh?

Heheh LOL! :)

Thanks Julie! :)

Texas sure seems like an interesting place with lots of interesting folks. I've never made it there yet but I hope to do so one day. :)

I've really gotten interested in Texanisms.... Mostly because of what I saw of Dan Rather's use of Texanisms on election night. I enjoyed them!

Actually, they remind me of some colorful sayings here in Oz -- though my impression so far is that most of the Aussie sayings seem to be uhh... less suitable for the prudish. :)

As they say in Oz, these Texanisms are better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick....

So I'm hopin' to make it to the Lone Star State one day to visit the great people of Texas first-hand.... )

Dien Rice

P.S. I already know that I like Californians -- I spent around 5 months in Berkeley in 1994-95, umm... that's typical Californian right? :) (Heheh, just kidding... I guess most Californians don't have piercings through every possible flap of skin like they do in Berkeley....)

P.P.S. I've found a whole collection of Dan Rather's colorful expressions from election night, many of them might be Texanisms (any comments?).... Here they are....


1. Sweeping through the south like a tornado through a trailer park

2. It's shaky like cafeteria jello

3. They are cracklin like a hickory fire

4. He just didn't tumble off the turnip truck

5. You can bet the rent money

6. If you are in the kitchen mabel, come back in

7. They are doing backflips in Nashville

8. It's hotter than a New York elevator in August

9. He swept the south like a big wheel through a cotton field

10. It's so tight, you can't get a cigarette paper between them

11. For him to win it would be like trying to scratch his ear with his elbow

12. It's tension city

13. It's cardiac arrest time

14. It's call 911 time

15. Hold on to your drawers

16. Turn down the lights, the party just got started

17. It's wild, wacky, wolly

18. They are jumping out of their seat like they had been stabbed with a hat pin

19. The lights are going out for them

20. Adios, been good to see you, not gonna happen

21. He'll be madder than a rained on rooster

22. Close only counts with horseshoes and hand grenades

23. This much tension, can't cut it with a saw, requires a blow torch

24. His chances are slim, and slim has left town

25. Votes only talk everything else walks

26. It's spandex tight

27. The opera isn't over til the heavy lady sings, but Bush hears her humming

28. They put up and now they can shut up

29. It's closer than pages in a book

30. Madder than a snapping turtle

31. California was a taco, Texas was a burrito, but Florida is the big tamale

and also these....

Don't bet the trailer money on it yet

About as complicated as a wiring diagram for some dynamo

You trust your mother but you cut the cards, I'm going to check it out again

He has his back to the wall and his shirt tail on fire

Closest race in the English language.

and believe it or not, here's some more....

"He spent money like he had shorted Microsoft." (On Jon Corzine spending $80 million to win his New Jersey Senate race.)

"They'll be doing back flips in Nashville." (On Gore winning Pennsylvania.)

"These returns are running like a squirrel in a cage."

"It was as hot and squalid as a New York elevator in August." (On the New York Senate race.)

"Bush has run through Dixie like a big wheel through a cotton field."

"It would be Shakespearean for Al Gore to lose because of his home state."

"This will have the people in Austin standing up like they got stuck with hat pins." (On the recantation of Florida results.)

"If he doesn't carry Florida, Slim will have left town." (On Gore's chances.)

"Hotter than a Laredo parking lot." (On the race)

"I think you would likelier see a hippopotamus run through this room than see George Bush appoint Ralph Nader to the Cabinet."

"This race is as tight as a too-small bathing suit on a too-hot car ride back from the beach."

"If a frog had side pockets, he'd carry a handgun." (In response to somebody telling him that if someone won one state ...)

"We've lived by the crystal ball, we're eating so much broken glass. We're in critical condition."

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