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Re: How will Barack Obama as president affect YOUR business?
Hey Dennis,
Thanks for the rant. Couldn't agree with you more. However, I've been thinking this over, and I think I have come up with the perfect world-class financial solution. See, the gummit . . . as a certain SOWPub celebrity might say . . . instinctively knows that borrowing/printing money is THE solution to all problems in the country. Well, then, why not . . . Install a special mint-quality printer in every household, and supply everyone with a stack of special money-quality paper too. Then, every morning when us ordinary citizens get up, all we have to do is fire up our mint-quality printers and print up as much money as we need for the day. End of money problems for the whole country! Instantly! The poor, the middle class, even the rich . . . EVERYONE will have enough money to take care of their daily needs. And the markets? Commerce? Why, it might take a little time, but they'll eventually go through the roof! Once people realize they can buy anything they NEED, they'll naturally start WANTING things they previously thought they couldn't afford. And, following the gummit's sterling example, they'll start printing enough money to start buying the things they really want in addition to just what they need. Want some Apple stock? IBM? Google? No problem! Big screen TV? iPod? iPhone? New car? New house? College tuition? No problem! Taxes? No problem! The gummit can tax as much as they want as often as they want . . . we just print up enough to cover all the taxes for the day, the week, the year . . . whatever! Want to save some money? No problem! Print up however much you want to save and go put it in the bank. No need to bail them out, the banks will make out like bandits! The rising price of gas? No problem! If it goes up today, just print yourself a little more for tomorrow. Illegal aliens? No problem! We'll give them mint-quality printers too! Heck, we'll even send printers to their relatives back home. That way the illegals won't have to send their hard-earned cash out of the US, and that, of course, will help boom the economy because they’ll spend it here. Obviously, this really IS the ultimate financial solution, and there is no doubt in my mind that once we implement it here in the US, it will spread like wildfire all over the planet. Just think: All people everywhere will be happy! War will end! All merchants everywhere will be happy! Prosperity will abound! All gummits everywhere will be happy! They can raise taxes as high as they want! Everyone . . . and I mean EVERYONE wins! Wheeeeeee!!!!!!! ---- Hugh P.S. Remember, it is not MONEY that is the root of all evil. It is the LACK OF MONEY that causes poverty and crime. Wow! This solves crime too! When criminals can print their own money, they naturally lose their desire to steal it from others. And then people won't have to buy guns to protect themselves from the criminals, and they'll stop accidentally shooting each other like they do now. Man, I'm REALLY getting excited now!!! The benefits of this program just don't end! P.P.S. Now Dennis, lookie-here. I know what you're thinking. But don't go getting technical on me. Sure, I know testing is important. And yea, sure, money should be backed by gold or something like that, but you must understand . . . we have a financial CRISIS here . . . we must take BOLD steps . . . we must act FAST . . . we all must SACRIFICE. If we take the time to test this idea before we implement it broadly, why, the whole country could be lost. The WORLD even! I'm SERIOUS, man. We gotta push this though Congress NOW!!!! I mean, are you tracking with me on this or are you some kind of a fiscal-conservative nut-case stuck in some long-gone people-have-to-earn-it-the-hard-way yesterday? P.P.P.S. I don't know for sure . . . I'm not an eco-scientist or even a quazi-wacko environmentalist . . . but I think this might even solve global warming. PEACE, BROTHER! : ) |
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