I need some surefire ways of....

One other thing that might work. According to some
body language expert I saw on tv the other day,
if you rub the back of your neck, the waiter will
come over.
Supposedly, this is because its a sign you are
irrated and might start a fight and they pick this
up on a subconscious level. They don't know why
they come over, they just do. Hmmm...
Next time I'm out, I'll give it a shot and see
what happens.