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CHAPTER #8 - My Triumphant 3 Hour Trip to the DMV Torture Circus
CHAPTER #8 - Department of Motor Vehicles FUN & GAMES. How I OUT-THUNK The Employees At The DMV & You Can Too.
Ok. When I entered the DMV Torture room there were 13 Substations inside a giant open space. One employee at each desk. And a heavy-set Russian Lady at the front door. AND A LINE. MY DEVIOUS STRATEGY - I arrived at 2pm - late in the day. Why? Because Coffee drinkers get buzzed/fuzzy late in the day. They want to go home. And most folks at the DMV are chubby and over-weight. So after a day of filling out forms via computer screens. And taking photos of UNhappy drivers... Their eyes hurt. Feet hurt. Joints ache. Headache too. I confirmed this at the DMV. Squinting, fidgety, slumping, limping workers are EZ to spot. How did I Predict all of this Before I arrived? HUMAN NATURE does not change. I had a job at a Big University. I managed 500 Janitors and maintenance men. They'd literally RUN out to their cars at 5pm. Race each other out of the parking lot. Literally last week a little brunette cashier named Jessica LOCKED me into her STAPLES office supply store. She pulled the huge metal grate over the front door 30 minutes BEFORE closing. I had two Tasks at the DMV Circus: I - Renew my drivers license II - Transfer Title and Tags My Computer # was I-17. I remember it well because the computerized voice called it THREE times in 3 hours. (They don't use names. Just a #.) 2 PM - The heavyset Russian lady Gave me a # and 3 Forms to fill out. 2:30PM - A heavy Black lady typed in my Insurance data and charged me 110.00 to transfer the truck title. 3Pm - I sat - watched 2 kids beat each other up. Until their Dad sat btwn them 3:30PM - I sat - Watched SCARY - chubby folks in wheelchairs, crutches, limping behind rolling walkers and canes GET Handicapped Drivers Licenses. 4PM - WHOOPEE. Bored Employees Sat Up and Worked Faster. 1st - I-17 got called. A Brunette sat there. Hair in a pony tail. My Registration Card was 3 years old. She didn't care. 2nd - My License was beat up. Dirty. Photo and Social Smudged. She didn't care. 3rd - Ms Pony Tail Raced Across the room and WAVED at me. I hurried over to a black guy with Dreadlocks. He typed in some more computer forms. Took my photo. Charged me 24.00 4th - 2 Minutes later. An Asian lady next to him waved at me. She handed me my laminated Drivers license. 4:15PM - there were BARS and Red Traffic Cones and Yellow TAPE over the entrance door. The Russian lady had to un-bar, unlock, un-tape 2 sets of doors to let me out! A I tell my White-faced and sweating Clients after an hour of Brainstorming ideas for their business in a conference room. As They Leave to go lie down and rest cuz they can't use their BRAINS for very long without MASSIVE MINERALS and Nutrition. "You Should eat Super Spinach like me. That way you can Out-Think and out-work your coffee, red bull guzzling competitors." Obviously a little Extra Brain-Power helps in the struggle against coffee drinking - McDonalds fake-food eating - DMV workers too. Thanks, Glenn ================ ================ ACTION SUMMARY - Ok. Obviously this is my own personal Super Spinach Story. A recent one too. Notice how I Used... A, B, C I, II #1, #2, #3 - Why did I do that? Because An outline format helps get Specifics organized. And when you are writing up your own experience. Especially one that happened over 3 hours. BORING in the extreme. Except for the planning. And the last few minutes BEFORE closing time. It's a good strategy to outline specific points with BULLETS. I will bet you. That the Next time you think about arriving at 7:30Am at the DMV - you will think twice. Depending on what you have to do. A long line at 8am might not be your best plan. I didn't have an Up-to-Date Registration card. Drivers license dirty, wrinkled, unreadable. BUT I knew their computers had all the data. I wanted the DMV folks TIRED and Eager to go home so they didn't get FUSSY about the small stuff. Gummn't folks LUV to go crazy about such details. OK. Next Up. CHAPTER #9 - |
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