Last Saturday I was at a...

...graduation (yawn)...surrounded by The Pretentious Pack with their red wine and inquisitive eyes...”So what do you DO?”

Some typical answers surrounding me:

“I’m an investment banker for Fidelity.”
“I’m a doctor of neuropharmacology at Mass General...”

Here’s a few new answers I want to try out:

“I teach cow-tipping classes.”
“I’m a fishmonger-in-training...”
“My name is Bond, James Bond.”

Of course, I didn’t want to say “Well, I hate all work, really. I’m just looking for a way to make big bucks while doing absolutely nothing...sitting by the pool drinking Dewar’s...with the Hawaiian Tropic girls.”

That always goes over well. Blank stares.

Welcome to the foppish game of “Who’s Winning the Rat Race?” (also known as “Who Here Has the Most Golden Baubles?”) Answers like the above automatically place one in the category of...Mental Patient (at least among this crowd), to where I have been relegated for at least the near future.

See, I got this degree in Film (hahahahahahaha...like there’s such a thing as a degree in Film...oh, sonovagun, looky there, I really do have a degree in...Film!). Many years later, I still get asked, “What’s your degree in?” This inevitably leads to “Ohhh….that’s SOOOOOO interesting...so do you work in film?”

“No, I sell supermarket equipment.”

“Really? How did you get into that with a film background?”

“Well, I filled out an application...see, I had to make MONEY to pay the rent."

More blank stares.

Does this banality ever end?

I’ve come to the conclusion that whatever I am...and that’s still a work-in-progress...and pretty much always will be a work-in-progress (because how do you ever know you’re THERE…wherever THERE is?) I am not ONE THING. Who is? Everybody wants to be defined and to define by that pointed-stick question “So...what do you DO?”

As if that’s what you ARE.

Don't let anybody do this to you. Remember, you are many things.

For example, I am a Sunset-Watcher, a Hamburger-Eater, a Guinness-drinker, a Stop-and-Watch-All-The-Pretty-Sights-Along-the-Way-Because-We-Only-Have-So-Much-Time-Type-Thinker.

Which is why I’m here. I don’t want to spend all my life WORKING, get to the end and say “So that’s it, huh? Where was the fun?”

This is why I visit the forums, and I’ve been finding a lot of inspiration. I’m working on Gordon’s “What do you want to do...and WHY do you want to do it?” Ah, but that’s another post.

So as you go to graduations with tinkly champagne glasses these upcoming weekends...

How about this...how about adding two little words to that phrase for the graduation ceremonies for certain to raise the eyebrows of the yachting crowd: “So what do you do FOR FUN?”

If their work is fun, they can talk about it. If not, they can tell you what they really like.

Not to mention, it might get people to start thinking about FUN instead of the usual B.S.

This may get more blank stares...but if you’re going to get blank stares…you may as well have a little fun with it, right?

Happy Graduations.

John Drake