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Old May 11, 2012, 10:16 PM
Dien Rice Dien Rice is online now
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,357
Default Another situation - doing favors for a murderer...

Hi Cornell and everyone,

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cornell View Post
What I found disconcerting was the idea of doing this "expressly for the purpose" of getting something in return....and in the case of the food probably at the expense of the owner and perhaps the employee's job.

I have fired people for giving things away with out express permission to do so. In fact my daughter is a supervisor at a fast food and an employee there was recently terminated for handing out a cookie for free.

And yes many of the food places have guidelines for throwing out food and they also have guidelines about giving it away because of liability...but no matter the case... until the clock points to the hour and minute for disposal that food remains the property of the owner and is a profit item that is to be sold.
Thanks Cornell - I completely respect your point of view.

One way I see it is that, businesses give out "freebies" all the time, with the express purpose of getting more business.

What's more "unusual" here is that it is the customer now doing it. But if businesses can give out a "freebie", then why not customers, too?

(The difference with tipping is that restaurant staff expect to be tipped, whereas Glenn's idea is completely surprising and unexpected...)

"Giving" something also doesn't have to be material. Some people give genuine compliments, because they know it will improve their success.

One example could be a romantic date. The guy knows (it might be subconsciously) that if he genuinely compliments something about his date to her, then the date will be more likely to end positively. Does that make it a bad thing to do? (I think most guys would be guilty, if it were a crime to give a compliment to your date...)

I think in many cases, these kinds of "favors" we give become ingrained in us as habits.

These are all just variants on "reciprocity"... It works because it is built deeply into our inner human psychology.

By the way, I'm reading a very interesting book at the moment about Japanese culture. This book says that giving gifts is built into Japanese culture, because the gift-giver then knows that they can get a favor in return at some point from the recipient, if they need it.

(If someone doesn't like to be "obligated" after receiving a gift, they know that to no longer have the obligation, they should give some kind of gift in return back to the gift-giver as soon as possible. Once they give a gift in return, they know that they no longer have any obligation...)

Quote:
Now if the person says thanks for the ticket and gives the customer something in return of his own that is one thing...also if the person pays for the giveaway that is acceptable...but to give away his employer's goods - unless authorized to do so is ....well......in my eyes that is theft.

I also have had establishments offer something free just before closing ...saying that they were just going to throw it out anyhow....but it was after the deadline....whether they had permission to do so or not is unknown...but I had to presume so.

I guess it is up to the individual to decide on this...the lesson is good...the "reason" for doing it does not sit well with me.

Let's leave it at that.

Cornell
If there is a person at "fault" here (which I don't think we know completely for sure, since we don't know all the conditions), then it was the employee's fault for doing something he shouldn't have... Also, while in this case he's probably an employee (because of his youth), in other cases it could often be the restaurant owner (as, to my understanding, it is not uncommon for restaurant owners work in their own restaurants). When this has happened to me, I never really thought about it, but I always assumed that it was the business owner who was serving me and who was giving me the free stuff. (When this has happened to me, it's usually at independently-owned take-away type restaurants.)

There were places I knew in the past that would "regularly" give you additional free stuff with your order... And yeah, I kept going back! (This was when I lived in a different area from where I live now.)

There is one "fish and chips" store near where I live, which is probably the most expensive "fish and chips" store in the area. However, they are probably the most successful too. A couple things they do is, (1) they do have higher quality food, for example, their frying oil seems fresher and better quality than the other ones, and (2) they often seem to give you a little bit extra with your order, that you didn't ask for, for free. (I don't go there often, though, because I don't like eating too much fried food - I'm more health-conscious now than I used to be...)

Anyway... back to the more general topic...

The topic of "reciprocity" has come up now and then... But what I like is that these are completely new "angles" on the standard lessons...!

From one of the earlier discussions here (several years ago), the following link was posted... This is an article about a guy who used reciprocity to get a convicted murderer, who happened to be a serial killer, to confess to his other murders...

One of the "tools" which was used was doing favors for the serial killer... Like getting the murderer an independent medical checkup he wanted, getting him a specific book he wanted to read, etc.

Is it ethical to do favors for a serial killer? The end result was they got more confessions, and this helped to bring "closure" to the families of some of the victims...

Serial Murder, He Wrote
http://articles.latimes.com/2006/aug...tion/na-hess10

(The article is 4 pages long - the links to the next pages are at the end of page 1. The part about doing favors for the serial killer is at the start of page 3.)

Anyway, it's a good read... It was first posted on Sowpub here...

Best wishes,

Dien

Last edited by Dien Rice : May 11, 2012 at 10:47 PM.
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