Letter Crititque For Deck Restoration Business

The only thing I picked up was a minor spelling issue:
In a couple of spots in your letter, you use the word "there", when you should be using "their". Use "their" to show ownership. For example: "Cabot's works the best, I only use THEIR stain." and "Every customer who schedules THEIR deck to be done."

> Hi All,

> I have put together a letter that I plan on
> sending out to a vary targeted list, for
> starting a deck restoration
> business, and would like some honest
> feedback on it.

> I drove around my town and spoted decks that
> I think
> are in need of restoration.

> Then I took there house number and street
> address down.

> What I did then was went to
> www.smartpages.com and did
> a reverse address lookup.

> I then have a software program called
> smartboard
> running, which is a add-on to windows
> clipboard, that
> enables me to capture multible items &
> create a database.

> I then have the letter in word running in
> the background
> and switch over to word, I then address it
> to there sir name

> When I drove by I put down the price I
> figure I can do it for. I then put in a bid
> and mail it.

> Before I started I did a lot of research on
> the best stains
> and came across this month's consumer
> reports magazine that
> ran a article on the best stains &
> paints for doing this and
> attached the article about the stains.

> I so far have sent out about 25 letters and
> no calls.

> Here is the letter

> May 21, 2002

> Dear Mr. Jacoby:

> My name is Gary Creed, I am a painter here
> in Madison, WI and for the last two years, I
> have been running a specialty
> Painting business, painting Wrought iron
> railings & fences. The other day one of
> my customers asked me to stain her
> deck, which I did, she was quite Satisfied
> with my work. & I liked doing it.

> Here name is Ms. Jones 4219 McKenna Rd
> Monona, WI 53716 Tel 608-222-1894

> So I thought of how many other
> Decks-Steps-Fences etc. also needed this,
> and starting doing some research on the
> Internet.

> What I found was, that most people use
> Thompson's , which is one of the worst
> products to use. IT DOES NOT LAST.

> My research brought me to this month's
> Consumer Reports Magazine Pg. 47 Tilted Deck
> Treatments, House Paints.

> What I discovered was that Cabot's Solid
> Color Oil Deck Stain lasted the longest,
> Followed by the transparent stains.
> The clear sealers lasted the least length of
> time, they had to be redone every 6-12
> Months.

> Here's a post from an online forum at
> www.deckmaster.com that I ran across from
> someone who used Cabot's

> Cabot stains last forever. I stained my deck
> (Chicago suburbs, -20 degree winters, 100
> degree summers) 5 years ago
> And it has not even slightly faded. This
> product will probably last 15 years with no
> problem whatsoever.

> What he used was the Cabot' Semi-Transparent
> Deck Stain.

> I have already taken the liberty to look
> over yours and can do yours for $350.00.
> This includes thoroughly Cleaning the

> Deck Or Wood With Cabot's Deck Cleaner and
> applying there stain.

> If you would like to stop re-doing yours
> over and over again. Please Call 255-6691 If
> I am not in, please leave your
> Name and number & I will return your
> call when I get in.

> Sincerely,

> Gary Creed

> P.S. Every Customer Who Schedules There's To
> Be Done Before The Start Of The Memorial Day
> Weekend, Will Receive

> 1 FREE Bag Of Charcoal Briquettes.