What women/men want

TW, I think you need to study some psychology. While it's true no one (male or female) really understands the mind and motivations of another...even if they're shared voluntarily because most folks have no idea of their own motivations. They hide the truth because they don't have the guts to face their own frailties as mere human beings. This is not a gender thing...it is the way it is.

As for the 'horrible truth' that's hogwash. What woman can't accept the fact that any man lusts after anything attractive when he's in the mood. What civilized men do about it is what divides them from the mere reactive uncivilized types. What's so horrid about admitting we are the animals that God or nature intended us to be? Reality doesn't hurt...it frees us to use our minds and bodies to higher purposes.

Sandi Bowman

Originally Posted by Sandi Bowman

As for the 'horrible truth' that's hogwash. What woman can't accept the fact that any man lusts after anything attractive when he's in the mood. What civilized men do about it is what divides them from the mere reactive uncivilized types. What's so horrid about admitting we are the animals that God or nature intended us to be? Reality doesn't hurt...it frees us to use our minds and bodies to higher purposes.

I'm glad you feel that way. You may not (or maybe you do) realize how deep the 'problem' is (I put the word problem in quotes advisedly). I think the 'problem' is much deeper than most women realize. That's why I say the 'movie' could not be made -- the 'depths' would be revealed. When you say, "What civilized men do about it is what divides them from the mere reactive uncivilized types," I'm not sure you realize what a real (sometimes minute-by-minute) struggle it is. I think you think you know -- but I don't think you really do. But of course there's no way for me to know that, for sure! (whew)

Maybe the movie really SHOULD be made -- that way we men will know for sure the truth is out, and we can see what women's reactions to it are.

That link I included about the cds on this topic show that the discussion is needed, overall. It's hard for men (in some cases) to express the whole dynamics, because it's VERY UNlike the dynamics of 'what women want,' and it's very "base." (embarrassing, confusing, powerful, semi-uncontrollable, etc.) The description of that info-product puts it very well -- better than I can.

-- TW

Well, this is neither the time nor the place for this fascinating discussion.

I know that both men and women need to stop buying into the hype that the exploiters put forth. Women aren't Madonnas any more than men are beasts. Take away the cultural B.S. and you'd find that men and women aren't that far apart.

A study of some primitive societies where sexuality is as natural as breathing shows that both men and women share many of the instincts (drives?) that men in this society have usurped for themselves. It is also true that women have their share of the blame by going along with the Madonna hype instead of admitting the truth.

Movies about 'what women want' are entertaining to women because they're so far removed from reality they can laugh at themselves...and the stupid men who promote those fantasies. Maybe men could benefit by the same kind of movies about themselves. The movies would definitely point up the absurdities in our culture if well done.

Sandi Bowman

Not that far apart?

Ummm, let's look at the **** industry (aka the supply/demand marketplace) + who 99.99999% of the customers are (male).

Why is that? I think it is BEGUN to be explained by that guy's info product.

I agree the madonna complex is not accurate. But the 'men are beasts' theory, pretty much IS (true).

So, when you say, 'not that far apart,' I think my theory of women not catching on to the true situation, is accurate! You think you know the 'depths,' but you really don't. I contend that, if you DID know the 'depths,' you wouldn't say things like, "not that far apart."

Again, I use as a BAROMETER/INDICATOR the fact that the # of women who "use" **** is statistically ZERO compared to the % of men who do. Men ARE different from women in this regard (raw, impulsive sexual LUST -- aka: the inner PERV). Heck, even Jimmy Carter copped to it, remember? It's a 'problem' men have to deal with on an almost second-to-second basis.

No, women are not pure angels, that's true. But to say men + women are 'pretty much the same' is inaccurate, imo.

-- TW

Originally Posted by -TW

I contend that, if you DID know the 'depths,' you wouldn't say things like, "not that far apart."
-- TW

You can't know the depths from the shallow end of the pool. You're only looking at one aspect of the human critter, being sex.

Set aside all the minor differences between the genders, and actually go to the 'depths', you'll find that men and women both want exactly the same things.

They want to be accepted, and they want to be needed.

Charismatics need the adoring crowds to feel accepted and needed.

The crowds need to feel accepted and needed by their leader.

Both sides of that combination get tons of what they want.

It's the same on the individual level. That's why you will see a fat ugly guy with a great looking lady, or the other way around. People will whisper "What can he/she possibly see in him/her?". The answer is that each one of them is supplying the other's need to be needed and accepted.

I wasn't going to post this, just keep it in my idea file but, based on your last post, TW, I changed my mind so...here it is:

Well, TW, this isn't the place for the type of posts that could be made about this topic so I'll just state a couple of facts and let it go at that.

I'm sick and tired of hearing that men are so super-sexed and all that and that women don't have problems in that area. Super wrong! Sometimes the 'draw' that a woman feels for a member of the male gender is VERY strong and almost irresistible as you phrased it. Men don't have a lock on attraction. This erroneous belief is a manifestation of men's Madonna Complex more than reality.

As for Dennis, well, he's walking the fence, even so. More of an apologist than anything else. Like his stand on pornography, for example. If men are so aroused naturally by women, why would they need ****? I'll tell you why: because of their impotence and need to dominate and feel superior to women. **** fulfills their baser instincts toward women (look at how much **** is abusive and demeaning to women) that they're secretly deathly afraid they might act out...and end up in hell or jail (is there a difference?). Serial killer Bundy admitted that he used **** prior to committing his offenses so he could stop seeing women as people and just see them as objects. **** kills the best instincts of people.

Men need to stop buying into the hype and come down to earth and realize that they, too, use their emotions, albeit in different ways sometimes than women. Women need to stop buying into the Madonna myth and admit that they're human beings, too. Men and women aren't really that far apart sexually or emotionally. The major differences are cultural, not actual. A study of some primitive cultures where sexuality is as natural as breathing shows this to be true.

Sandi Bowman
P.S. Bozo is right on, as far as it goes, IMHO.

Sandi...you are not going to really like this but TW is right on the way men think. It is very tough for women to really to actually deal with and that why this subject is really something to talk about with other women.

I totally see what he is saying because we do work VERY differently.
Sex is a BIG motivator for men and it VERY difficult to repress at ALL times.
It is a constant battle.

I mean just look at it from a pop culture way. TW made a good observation regarding ****. I mean there are thousands of websites, videos and magazines made for men.


Other then one Playgirl magazine, I have never seen anything for women.

Why is that?


Now go to your local book store and you will see more then 20 or 30 BRIDAL magazines for women...guess how many wedding magazines are made for men?


ZERO!...

there is no such thing as a Tuxedo magazine or wedding magazine for men because there is not market for it.....

When it comes to what men basically want .....I am not saying that companionship does not fit into equation but...men are VERY simple compared to women....

Sorry if this bothers you

Terrance

Terrance, thanks for your views.

Like I said: study primitive societies that are without our hangups about sexuality and observe how little problem it is for both men and women.

Men and women in this society are subject to a ton of conditioning by the people who wish to exploit sexuality for their own reasons. This conditioning is a BIG part of the problem that you and TW seem to have with your sexuality. Sorry to be so blunt but it's all Pavlov in practice...with men being the dogs.

The only other reason men would have such a huge problem with controlling their drives is that they are those rare folks with extra male chromosomes in their physical makeup. For these unfortunates, it can really be a problem.

Sandi Bowman

Sandi

First, the reason most other primitive societies do not have the hang ups like we do isn't because of the men ....it is the conditioning of modern females that has caused the issues.

The thing that effects me and about every other male on the planet could be some conditioning to a small point...but there is MUCH MORE biological evidence also.

The male sex drive makes us do things in a very simple (non-complex way)
Females are the ones where it is virtually impossible to understand because everything is complicated to quantify.

I want you to check this link out to describe exactly what I mean from a SCIENTIFIC point of view

http://www.webmd.com/sex/features/se...-women-compare



Terrance

Well, I went to the thread. Didn't learn anything new. That is very old 'news' and most of it has been disproven. You or anyone else will read into what they wish to so I can't really comment any further on it. There were no 'controls', no scientific criteria established, and the questions were improperly phrased for a true research process. They never did state a hypothesis to prove or disprove.

Thanks for the input folks. Looks like I have more urgent things to take care of now since hubby is not well. Gotta run...

Sandi Bowman